The start of it all.

Before my diagnosis I wasn't your typical 26 year old. I am a wife and a mother. Most of my friends aren't even in serious relationships and I'm married with a baby boy (16 months old really, so he's more of a toddler now). But I digress.

This journey started back on September 13th. It was like any other Saturday in Columbus, OH, planned around the Ohio State football game. I was up with my little one and husband around 7:30 AM and we were hanging out like usual. I was getting ready to take my shower when I got a searing pain in my breasts. It felt like I was being stabbed from the inside out. I felt around to see if I was bruised and may have not known, but my husband didn't see anything unusual. So I let it be, but the pain continued. I felt around my left breast (since that is where the pain was localized) and that's when I felt it. A lump.

I panicked, I didn't know what to do. I made my husband feel it to make sure I wasn't just imagining. He did and my first reaction was "what do I do now"? I was in a daze, I didn't want this to be happening. He insisted that I call my doctor, but it was Saturday they weren't open. SO I did the next best thing, email. I got an urgent message from my doctor's office Monday morning, they wanted me in ASAP. I was already at work, but I hopped back in my car and was at their office by 9:00 AM.

This time I knew I wasn't crazy, the doctor even felt the lump. She did not hesitate and sent me a referral to a breast specialist. I scheduled that appointment for Thursday the 18th. Thursday came and went and I had an ultrasound and a mammogram and then had to schedule a biopsy because it was abnormal. As soon as I heard that word "abnormal" I knew this wouldn't be good for me. I'm not the luckiest of people and somehow in the back of my mind I just knew this was cancer.

Originally my biopsy was scheduled for Friday the 26th, the day before I would leave for vacation with my mom, step dad, and son in Florida. I'm an Admission Counselor and this was travel season, my schedule was not conducive to scheduling a doctor's appointment. After calling my mom and husband and telling them when it was scheduled, they were not happy that I was waiting over a week to get this done! So I called back and rescheduled the biopsy for Wednesday the 24th.

That day I was out doing two high school visits, but luckily I was done by lunchtime. I met my mom at my house and we set off for the office. The biopsy itself wasn't too bad, but my shoulder had dislocated and made my arm numb during the procedure. I left and we go lunch, did a little shopping, and finally returned home to my husband and son.

The next day was fine, no real worries. The doctor said it would take about 2-3 days for the results of the biopsy and that usually they came in between 1-4 PM. I told her I wanted to know either way, on Friday or Monday (I would be in Florida on vacation). Knowing that my results could be in Friday afternoon, I was a WRECK. Luckily I was busy in the office, but I couldn't eat or sit still. I always had to be doing something and I was worrying myself sick. Finally at 3:45 PM I realized my results wouldn't be in today and I could finally relax a little. I ate some fruit and got back to work, I had to prepare to be out of the office for TWO weeks with vacation and then travel in Cleveland. So thankfully I had much to do.

The weekend came and went in Florida and I was happy to be on the beach seeing my little guy in the sand and water for the first time! It was exciting, beautiful, relaxing, and tranquil- just what I needed after the past couple weeks. Monday rolled around and we were down at the beach as usual in the morning and I didn't bring my phone, I wasn't sure if I was ready for the results, I just knew it was going to be bad news. After lunch we took a walk on the beach and came back to a missed call. It was a 614 number so I knew it HAD to be my doctor. Sure enough the voice mail confirmed that and I called her back.

We spent the first few minutes on the phone talking about vacation and my son. Then came the hard part - she broke the news that one of my biopsies (the lump I had felt) came back malignant. Never once did she use the word "cancer", but obviously I knew what a malignant tumor meant. Strangely I didn't really cry, I shed one or two tears and then I was done. I got off the phone and had to break the news to my mom and step dad waiting in the other room. It was the first time that I had said it out loud. "I have breast cancer."

Those were four of the hardest words I have had to say in my 26 year life. Even harder than telling my family and friends that I had a miscarriage.

Then came the harder part - telling my husband who was at home without me or our son to comfort him. Then that became the hardest thing I had to do in my 26 years. I wasn't sad or feeling sorry for myself, I was PISSED. Why me? Someone my age shouldn't get cancer, let alone breast cancer! This wasn't fair and I wanted nothing more than a stiff drink (which my step dad readily got for me, thank you tequila) and to punch something (which I didn't get to do, sadly).

Somewhere in the back of my mind I knew this would be the result, but it's still hard to hear those words coming out of your own mouth. This was only the very beginning of my journey.

-AD