The end is in sight. Only four more treatments to go!! WOO HOO!
This week's treatment wasn't too bad. It was another one stick day for this girl's IV! That's two weeks in a row now!! I am trying to do everything in my power to not get a port and I have some extra motivation for that now too. My husband basically told me that if I have to get a port I will officially be on house arrest. It's getting nice out, I like the sunshine too much to be on house arrest. So I am drinking A TON of water everyday, limiting my coffee to no more than two cups a day (that stinks), and squeezing a stress ball like it's my job. Yesterday on our drive to the doctor's office, Colin made me squeeze a tennis ball the entire way. I really hate to say this, but he was right in making me do that because it paid off with the one stick for the IV. I love my husband, but it's painful to say he was/is right...
Yesterday was also nice because my treatment was scheduled nice and early. I was out of there at lunchtime and that's usually when I'm going in. I also sat next to someone who got to ring the bell after her last treatment and she was very encouraging. I congratulated her on being through chemo and she encouraged me to see the light at the end of the tunnel. All around, it was a pretty good day, except for the fact that I was so tired I slept for the remained of the day before class.
I can see the light at the end of the tunnel coming fast and furious. April 27th cannot get here soon enough and then it's a month of recovery before my surgery. This hasn't been an easy journey, but I am actually glad to have gone through it now. There is a reason and a purpose for everything and I may not know what that is yet, but I am sure going to find out. Whether I am meant to share my story to be an encouragement for others facing similar challenges or if I can urge others to not be afraid of the doctor and go get checked out. So thank you for letting me share my story with you.
Until next time.
AD
Tuesday, March 31, 2015
Tuesday, March 24, 2015
Light at the end of the tunnel
Well yesterday marked my descent over the Round 2 of chemo hill. Only five more treatments to go!
This treatment went much better. The nurse even got the IV started on the first stick, which is unheard of for me. I did find out from the doctor that I may end up with a port though. Apparently the nurses hate having to stick me so many time to start the IV for treatment, that they have asked my doctor to put one in. 11 treatments down with only 5 to go, I thought I was in the clear. Apparently not.
My veins hate me. There I said it. Even with drinking more water than I have ever consumer in one week in my life, it's still hard to get an IV started. So I'm convinced my veins are secretly plotting revenge on me for something I did to them in a past life. Boo on you veins, boo on you!
Unfortunately the ease of this round is starting to fade. The muscle aches and the neuropathy are starting to set in. The muscle aches make it hard for me to fall asleep and stay asleep at night. Thankfully I've only experienced this in my legs, but it can spread over my whole body. And the neuropathy comes and goes in my hands and feet. It is the strangest feeling because mine is in my fingertips or toes. For my hands, it starts at my wrist (kind of like carpal tunnel) and radiates down into my palm and then into my fingers. I feel like my hands were asleep and just woke up to the pins and needles feeling. My feet are the same way, only the sensation starts in the arch of my foot and radiates to my toes. It's funny to watch me walk across the carpet when this is happening because my feet feel itchy!
I can finally see the light at the end of the tunnel, both with chemo and my class (only seven more to go)! Then comes the real fun. I have my surgery date. I'm both nervous and looking forward to end this journey. It's not going to be easy, but none of this has been. The surgery recovery is going to be hard and not pretty at all. I know though, that this is the only way that I will have peace of mind in the end. Knowing that I have done everything in my power to make sure this doesn't happen again, to make sure that I am here for the long haul. My cancer diagnosis wasn't the end of the world for me, it was the beginning of a new one. 2014 and 2015 have been tough and I don't see it getting easier any time soon. So I'm going to grit my teeth and do my best to get through with a smile on my face and hope that 2016 brings better health, luck, love, and happiness.
I mean come on, I have this face to come home to everyday!
Thank you again for all of the love, positive thoughts, and prayers you all have been sending.
Until next time.
AD
This treatment went much better. The nurse even got the IV started on the first stick, which is unheard of for me. I did find out from the doctor that I may end up with a port though. Apparently the nurses hate having to stick me so many time to start the IV for treatment, that they have asked my doctor to put one in. 11 treatments down with only 5 to go, I thought I was in the clear. Apparently not.
My veins hate me. There I said it. Even with drinking more water than I have ever consumer in one week in my life, it's still hard to get an IV started. So I'm convinced my veins are secretly plotting revenge on me for something I did to them in a past life. Boo on you veins, boo on you!
Unfortunately the ease of this round is starting to fade. The muscle aches and the neuropathy are starting to set in. The muscle aches make it hard for me to fall asleep and stay asleep at night. Thankfully I've only experienced this in my legs, but it can spread over my whole body. And the neuropathy comes and goes in my hands and feet. It is the strangest feeling because mine is in my fingertips or toes. For my hands, it starts at my wrist (kind of like carpal tunnel) and radiates down into my palm and then into my fingers. I feel like my hands were asleep and just woke up to the pins and needles feeling. My feet are the same way, only the sensation starts in the arch of my foot and radiates to my toes. It's funny to watch me walk across the carpet when this is happening because my feet feel itchy!
I can finally see the light at the end of the tunnel, both with chemo and my class (only seven more to go)! Then comes the real fun. I have my surgery date. I'm both nervous and looking forward to end this journey. It's not going to be easy, but none of this has been. The surgery recovery is going to be hard and not pretty at all. I know though, that this is the only way that I will have peace of mind in the end. Knowing that I have done everything in my power to make sure this doesn't happen again, to make sure that I am here for the long haul. My cancer diagnosis wasn't the end of the world for me, it was the beginning of a new one. 2014 and 2015 have been tough and I don't see it getting easier any time soon. So I'm going to grit my teeth and do my best to get through with a smile on my face and hope that 2016 brings better health, luck, love, and happiness.
I mean come on, I have this face to come home to everyday!
Thank you again for all of the love, positive thoughts, and prayers you all have been sending.
Until next time.
AD
Wednesday, March 18, 2015
It's been a while
It's been a little while since I've updated you all on my life during chemotherapy. I'm still here, I promise.
This has been a crazy seven months for me. From finding a lump, to the biopsy, to the surgery, to chemo. It's been a journey to say the least. But, I am so happy to say that I am HALF WAY DONE with Round 2!!! I am so excited to say that. Six down. Six to go.
Round 2 has been so much easier than Round 1, at least with eating and the nausea. What really sucks about this round is that I have to go every week. And let me tell you, I have become a regular. The nurses (most of them) know me by name because I've been there 10 times (and I still have six left)! It's sad when I answer questions before I even answer them. And my hands/arms are taking a beating with the IVs. Some days it's easy, others (like this past Monday) it was a bit rough. Apparently my veins did not want to cooperate at all, so I have lovely bruises on both of my hands.
But on a different note, I wanted to share a little piece of my mind with you all. I have gotten so many comments from people that think I'm crazy to still be going to classes (for my MBA) and going through chemo. The only person who has understood why I'm still doing everything I can is my brother-in-law. I am trying to keep my life as normal as possible and not giving up on anything just because I have cancer. I don't want to be a saint or have everyone telling me, "I don't know how you do it." I HAVE to do it. I need to keep going because if I don't, I feel like my cancer is going to win and I can't let that happen.
Going through chemo has taught me so much, this entire journey really has. I have become a better version of myself. I've finally started to really take care of myself, both body and mind. I've started doing yoga, I try and go every Saturday and I think that has really helped me through this journey. And to be quite honest, I'm kind of addicted now! So thanks Seven Studios for that, your Groupon got me hooked! I even went outside of my comfort zone last night and took an acro yoga class. I surprised myself with how much strength I actually had. I mean this both in the literal and figurative sense. I let myself go and have fun and trust someone I have never met before to fly me around while holding myself up with just my core and legs. I didn't get a picture this time, but I'm hooked and I'll share a photo from next week with you! It was crazy and so much fun. In the figurative sense of strength, I never really knew how strong I was until this journey. I never used to be a very positive person, I was very skeptical and wouldn't have considered myself a pessimist, but definitely a realist. That mindset is very taxing. It's so much better to try and be positive, I really feel that a weight has been lifted during all of this because I'm always looking for the silver lining. This sucks. No one should have to deal with cancer at any age, but especially while you're young. But there is a silver lining to all of this for me. At least I found it early.
Everyday is a blessing for me. I get to spend my time with my husband and son, who drives me nuts but keeps me sane at the same time. I have taken the initiative to take care of myself and listen to my body and I guess sometimes my husband. I am lucky to be surrounded by friends, family, and co-workers who are rooting for me and supporting me along the way. I had a follow-up with my surgeon this past Friday and will taking a huge leap this summer by having a bilateral mastectomy with reconstruction. This decision wasn't exactly an easy one to make, but I think it's the right one. I'm scared and overwhelmed by both the surgery and the recovery, but also what it will be like living life without my breasts, which are a huge part of a woman's life. Letting go of the vanity is actually kind of hard, but thankfully they are just that, vanity. I guess I have something to look forward to as I get older, gravity shouldn't have any effect on me! And of course, my husband and mom both promised I would get one of these shirts...
Thank you all for sharing in this journey with me. And I promise, I'll keep you updated more often (sorry I had an exam last week)!
AD
This has been a crazy seven months for me. From finding a lump, to the biopsy, to the surgery, to chemo. It's been a journey to say the least. But, I am so happy to say that I am HALF WAY DONE with Round 2!!! I am so excited to say that. Six down. Six to go.
Round 2 has been so much easier than Round 1, at least with eating and the nausea. What really sucks about this round is that I have to go every week. And let me tell you, I have become a regular. The nurses (most of them) know me by name because I've been there 10 times (and I still have six left)! It's sad when I answer questions before I even answer them. And my hands/arms are taking a beating with the IVs. Some days it's easy, others (like this past Monday) it was a bit rough. Apparently my veins did not want to cooperate at all, so I have lovely bruises on both of my hands.
But on a different note, I wanted to share a little piece of my mind with you all. I have gotten so many comments from people that think I'm crazy to still be going to classes (for my MBA) and going through chemo. The only person who has understood why I'm still doing everything I can is my brother-in-law. I am trying to keep my life as normal as possible and not giving up on anything just because I have cancer. I don't want to be a saint or have everyone telling me, "I don't know how you do it." I HAVE to do it. I need to keep going because if I don't, I feel like my cancer is going to win and I can't let that happen.
Going through chemo has taught me so much, this entire journey really has. I have become a better version of myself. I've finally started to really take care of myself, both body and mind. I've started doing yoga, I try and go every Saturday and I think that has really helped me through this journey. And to be quite honest, I'm kind of addicted now! So thanks Seven Studios for that, your Groupon got me hooked! I even went outside of my comfort zone last night and took an acro yoga class. I surprised myself with how much strength I actually had. I mean this both in the literal and figurative sense. I let myself go and have fun and trust someone I have never met before to fly me around while holding myself up with just my core and legs. I didn't get a picture this time, but I'm hooked and I'll share a photo from next week with you! It was crazy and so much fun. In the figurative sense of strength, I never really knew how strong I was until this journey. I never used to be a very positive person, I was very skeptical and wouldn't have considered myself a pessimist, but definitely a realist. That mindset is very taxing. It's so much better to try and be positive, I really feel that a weight has been lifted during all of this because I'm always looking for the silver lining. This sucks. No one should have to deal with cancer at any age, but especially while you're young. But there is a silver lining to all of this for me. At least I found it early.
Everyday is a blessing for me. I get to spend my time with my husband and son, who drives me nuts but keeps me sane at the same time. I have taken the initiative to take care of myself and listen to my body and I guess sometimes my husband. I am lucky to be surrounded by friends, family, and co-workers who are rooting for me and supporting me along the way. I had a follow-up with my surgeon this past Friday and will taking a huge leap this summer by having a bilateral mastectomy with reconstruction. This decision wasn't exactly an easy one to make, but I think it's the right one. I'm scared and overwhelmed by both the surgery and the recovery, but also what it will be like living life without my breasts, which are a huge part of a woman's life. Letting go of the vanity is actually kind of hard, but thankfully they are just that, vanity. I guess I have something to look forward to as I get older, gravity shouldn't have any effect on me! And of course, my husband and mom both promised I would get one of these shirts...
AD
Sunday, March 1, 2015
Battle scars
I am three treatments into Round 2 and my body is already starting to feel the effects. My eyes are swollen, I'm losing my eyebrows slowly but surely, my eyelashes are getting thinner, my arms and hands look like I've been in multiple fights, and I am extremely exhausted. If I didn't already, now I REALLY look like a cancer patient.
The hardest part of treatment right now is the IV I have to get every week. Getting poked by a needle isn't fun anytime, but when they have to do it two, three, sometimes four times it really sucks. And having treatment every week isn't being nice to my veins.
I don't know if you can tell, but there are bruises on both my hands and arms from the treatments I have had thus far. That first picture is of my left forearm, which hasn't been used for an IV since Round 1 (5 weeks ago) and it's still bruised. The nice part of the Taxol, I haven't had any of the body aches yet. So I guess I can suffer through the bruises and nurses digging in my hands and arms for a vein... for now.
The hardest part of treatment right now is the IV I have to get every week. Getting poked by a needle isn't fun anytime, but when they have to do it two, three, sometimes four times it really sucks. And having treatment every week isn't being nice to my veins.
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